James and The Doctor
by chain.elements
Summary: What if the Doctor wasn't as he seemed? What if James wanted to keep his friends safe, even if it meant destroying their friendship and destroying their world? SPOILERS. AU.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: No. I do not own All Our Yesterdays.

James

His parents were dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Why?! Why them?! Why us?! James wanted to scream as his parents' coffins were lowered into the earth. But he didn't, he couldn't, he felt too numb to. A half hug circled his shoulders and brought him out of the haze of loss and grief and the whyWhyWHYs.

It was his brother, Nate, he realized belatedly.

"Why did they die? Why us?" the question slipped out as a hoarse whisper.

For a moment, his brother looked as lost as James did. "I don't know." Nate replied, unsure. However, his next words were determined. "But we'll get past this. Everything's going to be fine, as long as we have each other."

James hoped so.

…

It was slow and not quite steady, but they eventually adjusted into their new places in each other's lives. Nate became his guardian and provided for the both of them while James hung out with his friends, caused as little trouble as possible, and studiously blazed into the sciences. That was when his rather clever mind stumbled upon a certain something - time travel. Time manipulation to be exact.

That was when he really started thinking. This was it! This was what could bring their parents back. And he could do so much more! He could fix the world's wrongs! This could save thousands, no millions of lives! Just think of the possibilities! He could be a hero! (Despite what others thought, he was no where near over their parents' deaths... Maybe, they knew that.)

It became an obsession. His every waking moment was dedicated to this one purpose: to to bring this dream alive. And eventually he got a way with the government. Nate was happy over his new interest and energy, but worried about his obsessiveness. His friends, Finn and Marina, made it their job to make sure he stayed suitably sociable and sane. Well, something like that.

It was the new normal... until Nate was shot on his first big move as politician. At the hospital, the doctors said that they didn't know if he could make it. James panicked. No! Not his brother, not the only family he has left! He won't let it happen. It won't.

James fell into his own little world. His obsession turned him into a near wreak as he fervently worked on a solution. Just a little more, it was almost finished and he could prevent this from happening. James thought, but...

An unplanned interruption burst in in the form of Finn and Marina. Not the current ones that he knew, but ones from the future. Their faces were gaunt and their bodies emancipated. They looked like prisoners. It was a shock when Marin- no, it was Em pointed a gun at his head. Staring crossed eyed at the end of it's barrel (it was far to close for comfort), he barely stuttered out a "Why?" Future Finn (it was quite strange to look at on older version of his friend) deigned on tell him why they were so intent on killing him.

It was horrible. So many lives ruined, friends and family dead. The future was terrible place and it only became terrible because of his actions. Due to the thing that was his life's work. He couldn't believe it could it really have been him? The look in their eyes answered. _Yes, it was you James._

 _Nonononono, that couldn't have been him, never!_

Now, mere days later, looking into the eyes of The Doctor, his future self - his horrible, twisted self, he... understood. Wrenching the gun from those hands, James pointed the gun (heavy and gunmetal gray) at himself and pulled.

 _I'm sorry. It's my fault. I'm no hero. Please forgive me._


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: No, I do not own All Our Yesterdays.

The Doctor

It started with our parents' funeral. That was when it really hit me that they were gone and never coming back and that I was never going to see them again. In that moment, I wished with all my being that I could bring them back alive. That was the beginning. Then, several years later, while I delved deeper into the sciences, I stumbled over some theoretical materials on time space manipulation.

Obsession blossomed. I spent every living moment pouring over these theories and making my own calculations and eventually my own theory. The government was quite supportive of my work and willing to make it reality. My best friends, Marina and Finn, kept me from being truly too absorbed. It was only thanks to them that I had any life outside of work.

Then Nate was shot. I panicked. During this moment of weakness, when this obsession reached a fevered pitch, I met that _man._ I didn't realize just how twisted _he_ was then and when _he_ offered an opportunity to save Nate, I fell the same way a gullible child is lured in by the promise of candy. Me, smart? Ha, yeah right… Even children know not to take candy from strangers. I was trapped.

From then on, I was under _his_ control. I didn't realize it at first, too absorbed in my work to notice, but that changed when I realized I was missing a vital piece of information and that my friends had it. That was when _he_ turned _his_ attention on Marina and Finn...

It was like a veil had been lifted from my eyes, that was when I realized just how fantastically stupid and utterly, helplessly trapped I was. So I planned and I acted, acted like a cold hearted bastard who enjoyed the destruction (What else could I call it?) he caused. It was better for _him_ to think that I was brainwashed and under _his_ control than against _him_.

Some of the things I did were utterly horrifying, terrible in every aspect. My friends looked at me as if they didn't know me anymore. To tell you the truth, I didn't recognize myself either. Eventually, they ran. And I, relieved and scared, covered for them for as long and as much as possible. When they were captured and brought in, _he_ turned _his_ attention back unto me.

"Did you think I didn't notice?" _he_ said, mockingly. I watched, heart sinking to the pit of my stomach, as _he_ tortured them. Their agonized screams echoed in the holding cells. "Do you work, do as I say, and I won't hurt your precious friends… much."

I kept my act up, becoming more visibly callous and cruel as time passed. I couldn't let Marina and Finn know. They'd do something reckless; it'd hurt them. However, even this act couldn't keep me from visiting now and then. After raging at me, Finn blatantly ignored my presence. The growing hatred visible in Marina's, or now Em's, eyes burned into my mind. I didn't visit so much after a while.

Much later, I heard that Mar- Em stole a spoon. My mind snapping to attention, I hurriedly made my way to the holding cell. Did she finally snap? Was she suicidal? Her eyes told me otherwise. I sighed in relief.

The next day, a misplaced guard said that _he_ required my presence. Unlikely, considering we were just talking on the phone, but I went anyway. Em and Finn snuck off to use the Cassandra to escape to the past. It was my chance to escape.

"Sir, let me go," I pleaded, "I know them, their habits. I can predict their actions. I can capture them."

 _He_ eyed me piercingly; after a short, tense wait, I heard a confirmation, "Make sure you do so."

Now carrying on my act, my final act, I tortured the past versions of my friends, killed Finn ( _ImsorryIdidntwanttoforgivemeimsorryimsorry..._ ) and pointed the gun at Marina. Bile rose in my throat, there was ringing in my ears, but my act didn't, no- couldn't waver. James, my past self, looked into my eyes, horror present, and with mine, I conveyed a silent, desperate plea back at him.

 _Do it! Free me! Prevent this from happening! End this act!_

He understood. A mock fight ensued and the gun was in his hands. It rose, glinting gunmetal gray, and the trigger pulled. Finally, I laughed somewhat manically...

 _Thank you._

Thank you for reading! This is my first time writing a fanfiction, so constructive criticism is appreciated.

CH


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